Back      Next

 

Thinking Alone


The epoch is unconcernedly too bright for me to grieve
I have too few things to spell out the words of sigh or sorrow
Vaguely I think why I write poems
Stopping to crouch and crouching
I try to think further

Another person is another person, and I am I
Then, what is the matter with you? I ask to myself
Without any answer to give
Writing like this, I drink bitter coffee to take a break

Incidentally, I think once again
What on earth is it to live?
What a fuss about nothing is to live? ..........
To live is simple mathematics, and
The answer has been already given to each person, so
It is not necessary for me to think of anything specific
That mathematical equation is quite simple and clear
I find out, however, that
The equation itself bears a curious inconsistency and that
Unexpectedly for a long time
The inconsistency in question has already bore deep into me

In the heave of ambiguous nonsense
It seems to me that
Everything is an imaginary number or meaningless mark
It is tiresome to me that I get angry or feel sorrowful
It is enough for me to let the time pass by leaving the problem to each esteemed person
Killing the feeling like a curse in vein or in the deepest of sorrows
Letting the things of no importance be in the hands of each person
I take a formal position of my own feeling somewhat like nuisance

Thinking again if it is really enough for me, however.......
I feel somewhat chilly in my mind, and
I am driven to the thought that I have to do something, but
What a foolish Don Quixote I am!
I try to think to let the weak of good will filled by superstitious
     belief, keenly sharpened, shivering and scared be saved
By massacring the happy traditional secret agencies
Completely destroying and exterminating ringleaders from their roots
Getting the clear sky and the beautiful environments back to our hands

Inhaling the poisonous smoke of cigarettes for encouragement
Looking for some real number in the crib table of entire emptiness where
     imaginary numbers are densely but neatly listed in a crosswise and
     lengthwise array of the indisputable mathematical world
I am playing games with my sentences like this all day long today
Sitting just in front of my beloved word processor of modern convenience